Don't Poop on the Stoop (and other things I never thought I'd say)

9/19/19

Dear Todd,

I'm sitting in the land of EC today. Wondering if you are there too. It's that place where you are looking all around thinking, "What is this all about really?" I walked into the kitchen to make coffee, and was greeted by three chickens staring at me through the back door. Their little nosy heads were lovingly framed by the the shredded bamboo blinds. (Courtesy of our 80lb Aussie/Lab with generalized anxiety disorder). As I opened the door to say "Good morning" to the poultry mafia, they looked up and dropped a load onto the stoop. Now, I realize that I am responsible for my own thoughts, however it did seem to send a pretty direct message: "Hi! Here's my poop."

And then I realized that I'm getting that a lot lately. I'm hearing the "poop" of everyone's day, and then I'm dealing with the "poop" of my own day: Busted blinkers, clogged tub, dead (ridiculously expensive) tree, dog poop in my yard, chicken poop on my stoop, other children being "poopy" to mine, etc.

I started wondering, if our lives are just one big digestive process? We take in the good, relish the moment, the experience, and then we sort of forget about it. Then all of a sudden, we feel a "shift" and are bombarded with poop. Whether it's related or not, it's a cycle. A yin and yang. Perhaps the real key is trying to find the emotional equivalent to a healthy "movement." I think it must have been Ghandi or Yoda who said,  "Balance you must find between laxatives and constipation in processing life events." Yup. Pretty sure. One of them. Bumper stickers abbreviated it to "Shit happens."

I find that the adolescents in our house are emotional laxatives, and the adults are emotionally constipated. So much sucks when you are 13 and 15.  As adults, for so many, it is so compacted and has to REALLY suck for it to be expressed. And by that time, metaphorically speaking, you may need to pull your toilet, but not before you stand in a pool of overflowed shit-water.

So perhaps the real answer to "what's this all about anyway?" is "enjoy the intake and learn to process your 'internal waste' in a healthy manner." And to that, I repeat, "Don't poop on the stoop."